m back!!

hi there
Gosh i have been absconding frm the blog world for quite sometime now.... wat a shame...n i hate giving excuses .... well i guess priorities shifted cos of some special events :) so i shouldn be complaining....
anyws ...it feels great to be able to cme home to my blog... "The Space" so lets begin the conversation with thy self!! :)
today a pregnant patient came to the dept. a petite thing already a mother of one pregnant the second time.... she had a massive facial swelling... lil did she knw wat grave trouble she was in... poor lady... at times i wonder why life gives us wat it does.... coming back to the dept scene... all humdrum surrounding her... people rush to take radiographs... another wants to pocket the case... n i too for a wild moment think like that... how stupid of me.... i wonder at times how barbaric n crude we get in dealing with patients... it is addressed as a "good case" n we go on to whose doing it... then again for our selfish reason we hold on to it till the desired period of time...
i pinch myself.. n step back... i look at her n thnk abt her life... her pain n a zillion things abt her... n i feel good... cos i din think selfish... we operate at 2 planes.. we can act selfish n we can think selfish.... more often than not we think selfish.... n i hate it when i catch myself thinking tat way.... ofcourse the patient's interest is wat we work for ..but somewhere we cross the fine line of humaneness .... i may get a degree..but i still need to evolve to a better plane... where i can neither think or work selfish but in fact work selflessly... its v tough cos we work in a pond with crocodiles all around us... conspiring ...conceiting... its tough to nt get affected.. but that's the challenge all about... to keep ur head above when all about u r loosing theirs.... its not big degrees which make big doctors..its small gestures n thoughts which make us worthy of being called one....